We've all seen the smiley face mascot that haunts the aisles of Walmart, but are things really that happy behind the scenes? We know that the customers of Walmart aren't exactly...um, well, you know...classy? There is a whole website showcasing the absurd "People of Walmart," after all. And if you've ever stepped foot in a Walmart, chances are you know what we're talking about. And so do Walmart employees. When you work at a Walmart, you see something new every day. And by "new," we mean "crazy." Like, really crazy. Don't believe me? Take it from actual Walmart employees themselves...
"Once I had a woman who was giving me a hard time about a coupon that was expired (coupon people are the worst). She refused to give up, she really wanted that dollar off. My line was really getting long and I was getting really frustrated. So I reached in my pocket and pulled out a Five and said 'If I give you a five will you give up on this coupon?' She got pissed and said 'I can't believe you said that to me.' She told the CSM but I didn't get in trouble for it." – Wright4000
Come on, lady. If you think about, cash is basically a coupon that you can use anywhere! She should have taken the deal.
"Working there as a cashier since October. Christmas Eve rolls around, and thank god I'm not scheduled to work. Cue phone call from the manager asking why I haven't come in yet that day.. 'I'm not on the schedule?' Manager - 'Yes you are' Me - 'I'm not coming in, I wasn't on the schedule.' Next day I worked was the day after boxing day, went and looked at the schedule, and lo-and-behold, someone wrote that I was supposed to work... In pencil... I quit shortly after." – HighStu
Good news for whoever wrote the name in pencil: You didn't have to work on Christmas. Bad news: Now you have to work the rest of the holidays.
"I worked on third shift for a summer between college years. The Walmart I was in had about 1 hour's worth of music playing over the speakers all night, playing on a nonstop loop. My sleep habits were already pretty f**ked from trying to adjust to third shift, but the music is what really did it. I heard that same music loop over and over again, all shift, five days a week. When I left the store, I would still hear it running in my head. Then I started hearing it in my dreams. Then, it got so ingrained, that I started just dreaming I was working my shift at Walmart. Several days a week, I would have the experience of working an entire 8-hour shift, then just around quitting time, my alarm clock would go off, and I would wake up and go work an 8 hour shift. I quit a few weeks early at the end of the summer because I was losing my goddamn mind." – MrApophenia
Did you guys see the sequel to Inception? It was the worst. It was basically 90 minutes of stocking shelves and mopping floors.
"One day a woman stole a bottle of perfume, and took it to the bathroom. She poured it out into her own container, and then proceeded to fill the container with her own piss. She then took the bottle up to returns and tried to return it. To this day I have no idea why my manager gave her the refund. It was very obvious that the woman pissed in the bottle because it was still warm. TL;DR woman steals perfume, returns her own piss, and profits from Wal-Mart." – bunchofdingalings
"Former Cart Pusher. Had an old lady try to tip me $1 after I helped her bring her newly bought plants or some shit to her car. Told her I couldn't accept it per company policy (and it was only 1 dollar so I mean it wasn't particularly enticing). She then proceeded to roll over in her little scooter mobile and stuff it down the front of my pants. She chuckled dirtily as she rolled away." – David_10nant
Did you guys see the prequel to Magic Mike? It was the worst. It was basically 90 minutes of pushing carts and carrying groceries.
"I worked in grocery as a stocker. We had just finished a cereal display near the front of the store compiled of about 100 boxes. In comes an older lady, around 60, driving one of the electric carts. She's looking dead on at the display and promptly rams into the thing. Boxes go everywhere and she starts apologizing over and over and explains that she's legally blind. A customer that was nearby and saw everything asked her how she drove here if she was blind.. She responded by quickly turning around and leaving the store." – Give_Me_A_Sign
As far as I'm concerned, this is the only reason to look forward to getting older.
"I worked the overnight shift as an Overnight Stocker for Department 8 (Pets). The store I worked at had just gotten brand new high rise shelves installed. They were said to be able to hold over a ton. Well, one night after getting all my regular freight stocked and the overstock put into the bins, my bosses had me pull 8 pallets of Arm & Hammer cat litter. The boxes had a bonus 10lbs inside, making them nearly 35 or so pounds a piece. They wanted all of those on the high risers. I asked if they were absolutely sure the shelves would be able to handle all that weight. I threw a shit-fit about it because I know I was in the right for being worried. Other department managers who were there also sided with me. They watched over the next couple of hours as I carefully did my job. As I was putting the final 12 boxes on the bottom shelf, I heard a cracking and tearing sound, and next thing I know is I'm buried underneath all of the cat litter that had caused the shelve to collapse.
"Everybody in the store heard it happen, and everybody was explicitly told NOT to dial 911 or anything. Fuck that shit! After getting all my blood cleaned from my face and cuts patched up, I called my uncle's girlfriend who is a lawyer, told her what had just occurred, and what the upper management was attempting to do. As of today, I still haven't spent all the money I received as a result of going to court over it." – TracksideHoax
I'm glad it worked out for this guy, but he's lucky he didn't get in big trouble for littering.
"Four hours into my first shift, I was facing items on a bottom shelf while a coworker was facing items on the top shelf. She dropped a gallon of Gatorade on my head. Management refused to let me report the injury or leave to seek medical attention. I finished the shift, dazed and in pain. The next day I found out my skull was broken. Officially, since I was not allowed to report the injury, it didn't happen at work. I rage quit." – manapan
On the bright side, I bet manapan was amazingly hydrated for the rest of their shift.
"My mom was a manager at Walmart... She told me about this woman who was trying to steal a prepaid phone. When she got caught by security she used the knife she was attempting to open the plastic packaging with to cut the security dude after cutting herself.... She then went on to scream at him that she has AIDS and now he's going to have it for trying to stop her." - lilytargaryen
He should have just let her steal the phone. Getting stabbed with an AIDS knife isn't worth saving Walmart $30 for a prepaid phone.
"I'll start with my grossest: A woman comes in with some panties and said they didn't fit and she wanted to return them for cash because she had already bought the correct size elsewhere. She had a receipt and plopped a Walmart bag down on the counter. Inside this bag were 6 crusty crotched, shit stained panties that were a biohazard from six feet away. Needless to say I did not touch them. I paged the manager on duty and he tells me to just TAKE THEM BACK despite being very nasty. Processed the return and she happily left the store with her $8." - teknrd
Now that you have that pleasant image in your mind, guess that's a good place to stop. Have a lovely, non-crusty day!