It really sucks that these are all dead. They were like giant lizards with helmets, but they were super sweet. Loved to cuddle. Three's always been a big number in My life so I liked the three horns. And they swayed side to side in this hilarious way when they walked. I really miss these things.
Honeybees do it all! They pollinate to make plants grow, they makes sweet, sweet, honey. And when it stings someone it dies, I really wish I had made all My animals like that. It really works out better in the end.
Honestly, I had a lot of fun piling cool stuff onto this thing. Smart as heck, can change colors, squirts ink, eight arms with suction cups, no skeleton, but a beak! Maybe I went a little overboard, but it's still super cool to Me. Kinda wish I made it talk, too.
It's pretty hilarious, I created an animal whose only purpose is to eat another animal I created. Not sure why I did this, but I'm glad I did. They're like a vacuum cleaner for bugs. I guess the regular sized anteater is cool too, but this one's giant!
Okay, here's God's dirty little secret. I'm a cat Man. They remind Me of Myself. They do as they please, show up when they feel like it, and aren't too concerned with how much you need them. But no matter how much a cat ignores you and scratches you and pukes on your floor, when it rubs up against your leg and gives you a nice long purr after a hard day, it makes it all worth it.
I literally spent four hours creating that amazing tail feather, perfecting every inch. That may not sound like a long time, but remember, it took Me the entire sixth day to create all land animals. That's a big percentage devoted to just one animal. And yes, the turkey was a failed first draft.
I was trying out a lot of new things here. It's like a giant hummingbird that looks like a fish. Maybe I got lucky, maybe it's because I'm God, but honestly, I liked the way it turned out. Wish they were more popular, maybe I should have made more.
These things just make me laugh and for that I had to put them on the list. I put on womanly legs, a giant head they shove in the ground, and a feathery version of the penguin tuxedo. Then I thought, "what if they were so big they couldn't even fly," and I cracked up for hours. What can I say, God loves to laugh!
This was the last animal I created on "Sea day" and I wanted something I could watch and just chill out to. That's totally the jellyfish. Whenever I'm stressed out about finite resources or the human ego, I just sit back and watch some jellies, bro.
This one's solid. Cows are My Scottie Pippen. Maybe not the star, but you need him if you want to win the championship. (Not lost on me is the irony that Bulls are a male cow. I am God after all, everything happens for a reason.) They give milk, they're great food, they're built to last, and "moo," right? What a great sound. India and Nepal really tugged at my heartstrings making this one sacred. Good on ya Hindus, even if you don't believe in Me.
I only made a couple of these and to be honest, I haven't kept track if there are still any around. They were a pretty crazy idea I just went with. Sometimes you have to stop second guessing yourself and put an idea out there before you can move on to the next one. That was bigfoot.
This one is close to my heart because it was a test run at having all males give birth. It didn't work out for obvious reasons, but the seahorse does a pretty good job with it. Also, no, they have nothing to do with horses. I actually forgot I used the word horse until the 7th day and by then I was already resting.
These amazing things are totally underrated by you humans. Unless you're talking about Batman, then it's totally overrated. (Sorry, not sorry!) They're nocturnal birds that are mammals, they sleep upside down in caves. You gotta remember, nobody was doing this stuff before Me. I made it all up! They even have a thumb and four fingers in their wings. Truthfully, bats are way more of a precursor to humans than monkeys. Also, do you know how many insects they eat? Like, 1,200 an hour. You're welcome humans!
I often wonder if this was the way to go with all animals, including humans. A strong protective shell, a small brain to keep them from overthinking; slow and steady all around. It leads to a pretty happy life that can last up to 150 years. I remember I was going back and forth on this philosophical question, then I made the dolphin: fast, hyper-intelligent, talkative, always moving, loved sex. I thought the dolphin seemed happier so I went with that for the humans. Sorry, everybody.
Ah, I'm just messing with you. Ran outta time on this one. I made a choice to do all the sea animals on day five and the land animals on day six, so any combos kinda got left by the wayside. That's why when people say humans evolved from creatures that came out of the sea I just laugh and laugh! I wish!
Okay, that's it! Hope you liked My list. And if not, remember, everything happens for a reason. Thanks to for Sarcasm Society for giving Me a pray and asking me to do this! Peace out! --God