Honestly, there's so many lame dating trends out there these days we've lost count. And it's also left us wondering, why the hell are we still trying to date? Why haven't we just run off to live on a mountain alone somewhere? Oh, yeah. Because human companionship is really nice when it works out. Duh.
Guess what? There's yet another lame dating trend that has just been labeled. And trust us, you're going to want to learn all about this one. It's, believe it or not, worse than ghosting. Even though we know that ghosting is brought from hell itself and people who do it should probably go there. Anyway, moving on.
Singles, get to know "Stashing." No, it's not another form of ghosting. It's it's own thing all together. Stashing is when you're dating someone, but they're not all the way in the relationship. The other person is "stashing" you away, hiding you from their friends and family. You're seeing them, but you're not seeing anyone else in their life.
You're a secret part of that person's life. You haven't met their mom. You haven't met any of their friends. You don't appear on their social media feeds. They're basically publicly pretending like they're not dating you. And it's lame AF.
Isn't part of the reason you're in a relationship in the first place so that you can be in really cute Instagram pictures together? We're pretty sure that's one of the perks. But for whatever reason, your partner is keeping you under wraps.
The term "Stashing" comes from when someone pushes all of the mess in their room into a corner, hiding it and making it seem like the room is clean. Only that mess is you. You're the thing that they're trying to pretend isn't there. Why on Earth would one human being do such a thing to another human being?
So by now you're probably thinking about your relationship and wondering if it's happening to you. If you just got back from a double date with your bae and their best friend, don't worry, because it's not. But if your partner never seems to mention you to other people or even acknowledge your presence in public, you're being stashed.
Did you go on vacation with the other person, post photos on social media of the two of you, then find out that they untagged themselves? And then when you look at their Instagram feed, did they only post photos of themselves? It's not narcissism. It's stashing.
Do you feel like you're living the lyrics of Destiny's Child's seminal hit "Say My Name"? Your boo is acting kind of shady. He ain't calling you, "Baby." He's not saying your name because he's stashing you. Beyoncé is too good to be stashed. You should be too good to be stashed, too.
Stashing can make you think that your partner is lying to you. If they're keeping you from your friends, what are they keeping from you? Or worse, it could make you feel like your partner is cheating on you. They're keeping you a secret so that they appear single to their prospective affairs.
Stashing can also make you feel more irrelevant than an 8 track player. If your partner won't introduce you to their friends or even acknowledge that you exist at all, you're going to feel like you don't matter to them. If they really cared about you, wouldn't they at least like your Facebook statuses?
But worse, it makes you feel like the other person is looking for something better than you. They're waiting for the next thing to come along, so they don't want to commit to you. There's so many options out there, after all, when you just swipe through all the apps on your phone.
This is such an epidemic in today's dating landscape, that we're sure it's going to get labeled as a dating trend any day now. Keep your eyes peeled! There's going to be some cutesy name for this announced in just a matter of moments.
Of course, stashing isn't always a douche move. There are a few acceptable reasons why someone would stash you. If the relationship is new, they might not want to rush into things by shouting their love from the rooftop immediately. Dating someone is like being pregnant. You don't announce it until the three-month mark, just in case.
Honestly, not being introduced to someone's family isn't always a bad thing. Maybe your partner doesn't want their family to get involved. They've heard, "Why can't you meet another nice Lithuanian?" from their mom long enough. They don't need to hear it again.
Maybe their family is truly insane, and they're trying to save you. Maybe they don't actually have any friends. Maybe their family lives in a different country. Could there be any good reason for this? If there is, hopefully your partner will communicate this with you.
That said, being involved in your partner's life is an important part of a relationship. And it is in no way shape or form not weird for your partner to cut you out of their life. Seriously, what's up with that? You better find out.
If you feel like you're being stashed, speak up. Mention it to your partner. Ask them why they're so weird about going public. Honestly, they might not even be aware that they're keeping you a secret, and you'll be on your way down the aisle in no time! Or at the very least you'll get tagged in a Facebook photo.
But if they start acting weird and try to make you think you're crazy, GTF out of there. Because life's too short for mind games. You want somebody who wants to show you off, and that's what you deserve. And no one deserves to be stashed.
With all this nonsense in the world, you might be tempted to give up. Don't do it! There is someone out there for you who doesn't want to hide your face behind a skateboard. Your time is coming, you just have to avoid things like stashing and ghosting at all costs.