If you have ever waited tables, then you know that it is hard AF. You run around like a chicken with your head cut off, it's messy and it can be downright degrading at times. One of the hardest parts about being a server is not knowing how much money you will go home with at the end of the night. If your table doesn't tip you, then they don't make any money. That is that. Waiters are lucky if they even make minimum wage. What you need to know is that if you are unhappy with the service, it may have been out of their control. The kitchen could have messed up your order and it may have had nothing to do with them. Go ahead and talk to a manager and complain, but you should still leave a tip. It's the right thing to do.
They are not your servant, they are your server. Believe it or not, there is a big difference. They are there to make sure you are fed properly and that you have a good dining experience. They are not your tour guide, concierge, drug dealer or babysitter. You are going to have to pay extra for that.
If you are unhappy with something, please say something. Don't huff and puff and be passive-aggressive and rude. Speak up. If they forgot your dressing, say something. Don't eat your salad without it and then write a bad Yelp review. Most issues are easy to fix if you just ask.
See that thing in front of you? That is a menu. You are supposed to order off of that list of food. When you modify every single little thing that you order, it is extremely inconvenient to the entire restaurant. If you don't like the menu, you should either go somewhere else or go home and make it yourself.
If you need a refill, extra dressing and a fork, please ask all at once. When you are sending your server to run around like a chicken with no head, they are unable to take care of the other customers at the restaurant. Save your list of requests and please ask for them all at once. A happy server means a happy dining experience. I can promise you that.
Yes, there is alcohol in there. One shot of alcohol. Just because you are used to the strong drinks that you make at home, doesn't mean there is no alcohol in there. If you want a double, you are going to have to pay for it.
If you go out to eat with nine of your best friends, please don't ask for 9 separate checks. Please, please, please keep it to three checks or less. Venmo was invented for reasons like this, so use it! It'll make it easier on everyone.
Your server didn't make your food and they didn't pick your seat. They don't own the restaurant they didn't design the place. They didn't hire anyone or make the menu and they can't fix the AC. They are the face of the restaurant and they are there to smile and serve you. So, if the food is cold or you hate when you are sitting, please don't take it out on them.
People may think that waiting tables it is a mindless job, but it is hard. Like really, really hard, both physically and mentally. It's stressful and exhausting so please look around and try to understand that they are doing 10 things at a time. You will get your Ranch*; you just may have to wait a few minutes.
[*Managing Editor's note: And you shouldn't be ordering Ranch in the first place because it is the WORST.]
This is really important so please listen up. Just because a restaurant closes at 10:00pm, that doesn't mean that you should roll up at 9:58 expecting a meal. If you come anytime after 9:30 you should be ashamed of yourself. If you've ever worked in a restaurant, then you totally get it.
When you tell your server that you are ready to order, please be ready. There are 50 other things that they could be doing while you are bumbling around and looking blankly at the menu. If you aren't ready, take your time. Just don't waste their time.
I know that it is hard to believe, but you are not the only person in the restaurant. There are many other customers, some who came before you and some who came after. Your server will get to you when they can, so please be patient in the meantime. They are only one person and they are doing their best.
When you are done with your meal, please don't camp out if the restaurant is busy. Your server could be making money off of that table. If it's not busy sit as long as you want, but please pay your bill so your server can go home.
And next time you want to have a public meltdown in a restaurant, remember this: Your server isn't saving lives, they are serving food. It's just food. No one is going to die or get hurt. It's a meal so eat up and stop taking it so seriously. Oh! And don't forget to tip your server, no matter what. If you don't understand why you should, go work in restaurant for a day and then you will.