Typically, when we hear about an abusive relationship, we picture physical things, and we typically picture men being the abusers. Marks and bruises are easy to see, and can let people around you know that you need help. Emotional abuse is just as serious, however, and the signs are much harder to see on the surface. This post recently came out on Tumblr, directed specifically at emotional abuse that teen girls may be putting their boyfriends through without even knowing it. Are you guilty of any of these things? Read on to find out.
Sometimes, guys have other friends besides their girlfriends. And sometimes, those other friends are girls. Just because those other friends are girls doesn't mean he's in love with them. If you trust your man, it's not fair to not let him speak to any other human female besides you. Not letting him talk to other girls is a subtle sign of emotional abuse, and could mean that you don't trust him in general.
Alright, so sometimes your boyfriend's friends are a little bit annoying. That's fair. But it doesn't mean that you can tell him that he can't hang out with them. Even if you're not the hugest fan of his friends, telling him that he's not allowed to hang out with them is abusive, and could be the sign of an unhealthy relationship.
Can we just all agree that going through someone else's phone is never okay? Sure you were just looking for that funny meme he showed you last week. We totally buy that. Nope, when you go through someone's phone, it means you think they're hiding something from you, and you're compromising their privacy.
What, people actually do this? Yes, it turns out they do, and it can be a sign of an emotionally abusive relationship. Sending your guy's number to a stranger as a test of loyalty is not only a strange way to prove a point, but it shows you're really insecure about the relationship.
This one should go without saying, but sadly it doesn't. Girls are more likely to get away with yelling at their significant other, because it seems less threatening. No matter how it comes off, it's still an indicator of abuse. No one wants to be yelled at, no matter what the issue is. Communicating like a normal adult might be easier said than done, but it's always the best way.
No, we don't mean like, actually blowing up his phone, because even that would be too unbelievable despite the other things on this list. But if your man doesn't text you back after five minutes and you freak out and start texting him like crazy, you might need to step back a little. It's not healthy to be texting every minute.
Yes, it's nice to give and receive gifts in a relationship. But if you're taking your boyfriend's credit card and spending his money without him knowing it, do we even need to tell you that that's not something you should be doing? That's not only emotional abuse, that's basically stealing.
If he goes to see that movie with his friends, he doesn't love you. If he falls asleep while texting you, he doesn't love you. If he buys a video game instead of a fancy dinner for two, he doesn't love you. Do you find yourself saying these things to your boyfriend? You're manipulating him into not being able to do what he wants to do. Stop that.
Do you give your guy a say in what you're doing? If you're controlling all the decisions, that's likely to be damaging to the relationship. What you do together affects the both of you. Give your guy a say, because both of your opinions matter equally.
It's a given that to be in a relationship, you have to spend time together. But you can't spend every waking moment of your lives with one another. If you're holding your man captive from the rest of the world, you might want to rethink your need for dependency, and the fact that you are indeed emotionally abusing him.
You know, every joke has a hint of truth. If you're always pointing out your boyfriend's flaws, you're promoting unhealthy behavior in the relationship. Not only that, you should be building each other up, not bringing each other down. Think before you speak, and be kind.
Again, do we need to tell you that you shouldn't be rude? Yes, we actually do. Sometimes, girls will be rude to their boyfriends to try to assert their dominance over them, especially in front of people. No one should have to put up with that, so if you're guilty, it's time to rethink your behavior.
Alright, we know we're talking about emotional abuse here. But this one does need to be said. Just because you're a girl doesn't mean you have a right to get physical when you're trying to get your way. Even a push or a soft punch isn't any way to solve your problem. It's never okay to physically harm your significant other, hands down.
Give the stalking a rest, and just trust that the guy you've chosen is being loyal to you. Sometimes, people even go as far to download apps that will spy on their significant other's phones. This has got to stop. Put the phones away, and talk to each other face to face.