Okay, some of these combos aren't so much "funny" as they are "true and depressing." In which case, maybe you should also drink to forget that you saw these two cards together. But maybe invite a friend over first.
"And after that, I'll ask you for feedback on my upcoming Ted Talk. And if we really want to get frisky, I'll show you a Google doc listing my monthly expenses! Oh, and then I guess we could have sex after that, but only if there's time."
Is that why old people smell like that? They must be getting down to business much more than people realize. But then again, they also smell like vegetable soup, and we probably don't want to know how that fits into the equation.
Actually, for the second answer, most people would prefer the cool, refreshing taste of Coke. But if Pepsi's the only thing they have available, you reluctantly accept. (And once again, RC Cola's not even part of the conversation.)
Drug abuse, rising health costs, income inequality and more are all problems facing our country. But this whole time, there was an even greater danger we completely ignored. Maybe America's decline could have been stopped with a simple, swift kick.
When they say, "You better watch out, you better not cry, you better not pout, I'm telling you why," it turns out it's for a reason. You better be good, for goodness sake. And you better be good for the sake of avoiding some stabs.