Yeah, death may very well be the thing that sucks the most about life. At least this guy went out with the pessimism that he so diligently cultivated in his life. Mr. Mitchell, we appreciate your honesty.

Sometimes in life you make bad choices and dig yourself into a hole you just can’t get out of. This guy really got in over his head … and now he’s dead.

Well, with that attitude, it seems like Jerry might have been shot by his jealous wife, Jeannette. Jerry, you wouldn’t have even been able to make any husbands jealous at age 102. Good thing women tend to outlive men.

Finally, some peace and quiet. No more coworkers blabbing incessantly by the water cooler. No more kids banging on the bathroom door in the morning. Maybe death should be something to look forward to.

I wish Leslie Nielsen’s gravestone read, “Don’t call me Shirley.” He lived a long and successful life though, and he’s left us a legacy of laughs, and made airplane rides all the more enjoyable.

You should have listened to Mr. Roberts. Usually when men are sick, they over exaggerate their symptoms and act like big babies. I bet Mr. Roberts friends and family regret not believing him now.

What a perfect tombstone encryption for one of America’s greatest TV show hosts. This was Merv’s final send off. Thanks for all the laughs, Merv.

This guy was a comedic genius. The actual epitaph was touching, but had this brilliant secret message. “Free your body, unfold your powerful wing, climb up the highest mountains, kick your feet up in the air, you may now live forever, or return to this earth, unless you feel good where you are.”

Hey, don’t knock it until you try it, right? Grappling with our own demise is one of the major crises underlying general existential anxiety. Well, we’re all going to have to “try it” sooner or later, and we might as well get used to it.

Uncle Walter was the man. Who couldn’t be pleased with a life of philandering and many a drunken night? This guy’s liver probably gave out in the end, but he had a good time while he was here.

Well, Herman wasn’t dead when this picture was taken. Hopefully he rethought his last message to the world. Even though Eleanor was a bitch, do you really want your final mark on this Earth to be about her?

I would love if Rodney Dangerfield was my “neighbor” in the cemetery. I could see some old ladie being opposed to sharing a plot of earth with him,though. Maybe in death, he finally found that respect he was looking for all his life.

You old dog! That’s a decent last request though. He could also have his ashes compressed into a stripper pole at one of those ranches in Nevada.

I always did think funerals and the expensive clothes people were buried in were a waste of money, especially for an atheist. Hmm … where would an atheist go? Would he linger in purgatory for all eternity?

That’s the perfect last line for the guy who voiced a ton of Looney Tunes characters. Mel Blanc really was a man of 1,000 voices. He lent his voice to over 3,000 cartoons.