The 1980s were a strange time. You can tell that just by looking at a picture of literally anyone from that era. It was a time for some truly ridiculous hair.
Tired of having to constantly buy new loofahs? Well, why not grow one on your head? Become a magical sponge unicorn.
This is some of the biggest hair I've ever seen. It doesn't even look real. She looks like a Lego person that had this clicked on.
"What's that? I can't hear you past my hater border wall."
[Person walks to the other side of them and repeats insult.]
"Oh... okay, I guess that's fair."
"Hello, ladies. Don't let my first impression fool you. I may seem like business at first. But in the back... all party, babes."
I'm not one to perpetuate toxic masculinity. But this mullet? It's alpha AF, bro. It even looks like he's wearing a crown, signifying he is king of hockey hair.
Mullets weren't just great for letting everyone know how bodacious you were. They were perfect for distractions. For example, how long did it take you to notice he was wearing a pink bolo tie?
"Sorry, Janey. We can't afford braces. But don't worry. We have an idea that'll ensure no one notices your teeth."
One of the best parts of your childhood were the cereals. But they often betrayed you. They sometimes gave you cavities, and your mom sometimes used the bowl to cut your hair.
Looks like they're about to cry, doesn't it? Wouldn't you? They for sure knew this picture was going to follow them for the rest of their life. Also, are those hair earrings?
"Okay, point on Melinda where you want me to leave your hair length."
"Barb, do I really need to keep this hairstyle? We could just use a picture, for crying out loud."
"I want my daughter to have as few distractions in life as possible. Her hair shouldn't be on her mind. Can you give her a style she can keep all the way into her 50s?"
Is that... hair gel?
You know what? Don't answer that. I truly don't wish to know.
"They used to make fun of my flowing sideburns. But now, years later, they're four times the size and thickness. And you know something? They make fun of me worse than ever."
Pictured here is a business casual Juggalo. They may be considered a gang, but you know what? Without their makeup and hatchets, they're actually pretty cute.