Seriously, eff these friends. Do they realize how hard it is to get permanent marker off your skin? They even went for the eyelids? This poor guy is going to be rocking the smoky eye till next Christmas.
Oh, why must teenagers be so dramatic? You know this kid took five selfies of himself crying because he thinks he is a pretty crier. News flash, you’re not. Also, hands down he is listening to My Chemical Romance.
Well, honestly, while this is excessive it’s also f***ing delicious. The crème is the best part of the Oreo anyway. Now we can just do away with all that unnecessary cookie mumbo jumbo and go straight for the good stuff. But, I don’t think that the original Oreo packing would be a smart idea for just the crème. That needs to go into a tube.
Wow, hipsters have really outdone themselves with this whole rustic chic thing. This is a f***ing stump for $100. I swear, this better be the original Giving Tree stump if I’m coughing up that kind of cash. We all know it’s not though. Honestly, if you want a stump just go for a hike in the woods and get one for free.
Teenagers completely lack the ability to think ahead. Boy, this girl is dumping your ass as soon as she hits her first frat party freshman year. You better start saving up now for tattoo removal … it is expensive AF.
Okay, this guy is extra but he’s also kind of my dream man. It takes a man with, ehmmm … tree ornaments of steel to rock a bow like that. I really hope he does this for every major holiday. I bet he’s rocking a pumpkin on the back of his head right now.
Okay, I thought that guy in the previous slide was extra, but this is just over-the-top. Did these people rob an inflatables factory? I mean, the damn roof is caving in under all that weight. You know Santa doesn’t bring you more toys for all the extra decorations.
Honestly, the bible is full of filth. It’s full of incest, foreskin, boobs and bestiality. So, this “daddy” thing is child’s play in comparison to what’s really in there. Honestly though, Jesus is one sexy daddy.
Oh, you poor sweet girl, you thought he was actually being a sensitive caring guy! No, chivalry is dead. Men these days are more likely to give you a bouquet of herpes than roses. I hope you do find your special orchid though.
Hey, I get it. Come on, what is Beauty and the Beast but a bestiality love story between a girl and a wildebeest? Oh, and that bunny from Space Jam? She was smoking hot. I personally have a thing for Mufasa.
Well, Keenen, I think you are far better off. Stevee just doesn’t appreciate your sense of humor. Also, they’re not the brightest bulb. If you’re going to use the number “4” to replace the word “for,” you really don’t need to write “or.” Like, damn Stevee, just write “for.”
Girl, sit down and take a snap of your lunch from the table like a normal basic bitch. It’s not like someone on Instagram is going to be like, “Wow, Stacy. I just love the perspective on this shot of your basic AF white toast mayonnaise and bologna sandwich.”