That busted DIY lifejacket isn’t going to help you out there. Sir, if you really don’t know how to swim, you shouldn’t be the one getting in the water with a child. Also, don’t we have enough plastic bottles in our oceans? You know one of those is falling off.
Well, if this beach were nude they wouldn’t have to be doing this. She’s probably just commenting on how small it gets in cold water. Or they could also be at a lake, in which that case she is definitely checking for leeches.
Now that’s a Jurassic Park style triceratops s**t. This is brilliant, and I am so mad at myself that I haven’t done this at the beach in all my life. If I get any weird looks, I’ll say it’s a snail shell.