Cat ladies are a special breed of woman. They have certain qualities about them that dog lovers just don’t have. If you live the life of a cat lady, whether it’s just one cat or multiple, you’ll know the following things to be true.
First off, you are constantly covered in cat hair. Even with a shorthair cat, you’ll find hairs superglued onto your clothes. You’ll find clumps of cat hair rolling like tumbleweeds across your living room floor. But, no worries. You have that industrial strength lint roller, don’t you?
Cat ladies know that their cats think the bathroom is a mystical land filled with horrors and curiosities. If it’s time for you to go to bathroom land, your cat hates being left behind. Cats will sit on your lap as you do your business on the toilet, they will stare at you while you’re in the shower and they will destroy the evil toilet paper roll that terrorizes bathroom land.
Cat ladies know that their feline companions can be finicky when it comes to food. That’s why dedicated cat ladies tend to splurge on the expensive cat food. Cat ladies will sacrifice the quality of their own dinner to spend a few more bucks on the good stuff for their cat.
On top of buying expensive food, cat ladies will splurge on crazy expensive cat toys. Perches, robotic mice and five-story cat mansions; they’ve bought them all. But they know cats will be much more content playing with a cardboard box.
Cat moms will have full-blown conversations with their cats. You have no idea how many times I’ve responded to my cat’s meow with, “Yeah, I know!” It’s happened a lot. But it doesn’t end there. There have been times I’ve told my cat about my entire day.
Prior to getting a cat, I’d follow about one or two cute cat pages; now it’s several dozen. My Instagram looks like an encyclopedia of cat breeds. I’m much more likely to like a cat photo than your vacation to Mexico.
Yes, cat ladies see a bunch of cat photos on Instagram. However, that’s nothing compared to the amount of cat photos cat ladies have in their phones. Every time their feline friend is doing something remotely cute (which is always) they take about twenty photos.
Dog people have The Dog Whisperer, cat people have My Cat from Hell. Dog people probably don't even know this show exists. It’s essentially the same concept. Instead of Cesar Millan, you have Jackson Galaxy trying to teach your cat how to stop being a total asshole.
Cats do not like to be disturbed, and cat ladies would dare not wake up their kitties if they were comfortable. If your cat is laying in your bed, they’ve probably sprawled out across the middle and given you just a sliver of space. But cat ladies will lie there motionlessly to keep their cats happy.
I’m just going to assume that cat ladies are a bit more neurotic than dog enthusiasts. Every time my cat sneezes, is meowing too much or has a funny-looking poo, I find myself looking for the closest 24-hour emergency animal hospital.
There have been plenty of times when your friends have asked you to go out and you’ve made some excuse to avoid doing so. Really, all you want to do is stay in and cuddle with your cat in bed. And you know what? You'll probably have more fun staying in with your baby tiger.
Having a cat can make you look like you suffer from severe mental issues. You look like you could be a cutter with all the scratches you have up and down your arms. Cats like to play rough and you don’t mind giving them your arm as a chew toy.