I’m on the taller side of female pattern shortness at about 5’4’’, but I still deal with a lot of #shortpeopleproblems. One of those problems is hanging out with my taller friends, and looking absolutely dwarfish in comparison. Bruno Mars is an inch taller than me, so I’m imagining myself in that photo.
When you’re short and angry, people tend to say things like, “Oh, you’re so cute when you’re mad.” This immediately makes me wish I could shoot razor blades out of my eyes into their general direction.
When you’re short, sitting in a chair that is a little taller than average will leave you feeling like a baby in a highchair. Might as well strap the bib on me and play airplane with a spoonful of mashed potatoes.
Food shopping can turn into a miniature mountain climbing course when you’re short. I personally am too scared to do this, as I don’t want the entire shelf to collapse. I’ll usually try to get on my tippy toes and look like I’m really struggling until a man comes over to help me. We all have our brands of feminism; damsel in distress in the grocery store is mine.
When you’re taller significant other isn’t around the house to grab something out of the cabinet, you gotta crawl up there yourself. I’ve also slipped on spilled olive oil while doing this before and came crashing down onto the kitchen floor. So be careful.
Being a short lifeguard is challenging. When doing pool exercises, I used to have to tread water at five-feet-deep while my co-workers just stood there comfortably. In such circumstances, it’s best to float.