I can’t stand that cookie teetering on the edge of his mouth! I did always wonder why the Cookie Monster was blue. Is it because he was depressed and filled the void with sugary sweets? In that case, I have a lot in common with him.
Jonas, Jon’t tell. Seriously, Nick Jonas looks like he is about to smash your phone. The only celebrity picture I ever got was when I took a selfie with a National Enquirer article on how big Jon Hamm’s Hamm was.
On the contrary, I believe it was meant to be that dark. How can you get to the printing stage of that ad and not realize that? Whoever this copywriter is needs to become an ad exec on every major campaign across the country.
Even if you know you’ve done nothing wrong, you always feel like a criminal when the cops are behind you. Just the other day I was driving and a NYC cop pulled out behind me and I worried that my hangover from two days ago would land me in the slammer with a DUI.
Is that a pussy in your pants or are you just happy to see me? Seriously though, cats cannot leave their owners alone in the bathroom. Mine insists on sitting on my lap, swiping at the toilet paper as a try to grab a few sheets and continues to look at me totally perplexed as I wipe my bottom.
Emphasis on the word “single.” As soon as I leave one sh**ty relationship, I tell myself it’s “me” time, and some f**k boy swoops in and ruins everything. It’s like they can smell the vulnerability oozing out my pores. Do they have a deodorant spray for that?